House of Zen

Getsu Fuhma Den

2011-06-14T04:54:00.001-07:00

Looking back I wonder what I have accomplished in life since the last post i made; I believe my sanity had left me in the year since.

If legends are born then today I will make a new legend.

Ikaruga: My Defination of a true Hero

2009-07-14T23:24:00.000-07:00

I know I can't save the world, or change the universe, but I just want to reduce the suffering of everyone around me. That is my justice.

---This was said by the famous ninja of the Ikaruga clan, Bang Shishigami before he fought the famous swordsmen Hakumen. Upon Bang's defeat he simply did not die, but vanished and later that night Hakumen stared into the night sky and saw the stars shine with what seemed to be Bang's face.

Magical Dreamers...

2009-07-07T01:58:00.000-07:00

What was the start of all this?

When did the cogs of fate begin to turn?

Perhaps it is impossible to grasp the answer now

from deep within the flow of time...

but, for certainly, back then

we love so many, yet hate so much

we hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

yet even then, we ran like the wind,

Whilst our laughter echoed, under celurean skies...

One day, when our lives are apart,

I won't forget any of you.

The Bloodedge

2009-07-03T14:56:00.000-07:00

Tonight we stand strong in place,
To defeat the devious people,
To put on a strong face,
Lost forever, out into space,

Battle never ends,
Comrades and friends,
The loss of the coin toss,
We learn who truly is boss
At the ultimate cost.

FUCK

2009-04-21T11:53:00.000-07:00

Everyone and their stupid thoughts and ideas.
You can all fuck off.

Every single one of you fucking idiots

To become more then just human... Part 1

2009-04-19T01:39:00.000-07:00

Humans live.
Humans multiply.
Then Humans die.

This is the code of living the mortal life...
To transcend to immortality.
One must leave a mark.
So there name is never forgotten in the Annuals of Time.

He who can be remember for any thing he does far beyond his life time, is he who truly becomes immortal.

To Understand Love

2009-04-19T01:33:00.000-07:00

Love is something that is hard to explain.
But easy to understand once you truly know its meaning.

What love is... It is a music.
A silent music.

Sadness that comes and goes

2009-04-19T01:28:00.000-07:00

There is a sadness in me that comes in go.
This is called Musou-Tensei in Japanese
it translates to True Sadness.

It is a power that is said to be supreme
and once one learns this...
they learn how to cope with everything in this world.

I miss you.
Quite a lot.

I will forget the bird that flew away...

2009-04-16T00:04:00.001-07:00

I'm extremely happy when your around.
I know I don't have a lot going for me.
But I hope you know I want to be there for you.

And maybe one day get freak nasty after some expensive dinner :D

Side story: The Story of Nanto Sei Ken

2009-04-14T02:03:00.000-07:00

There are 108 stars in the sky that belong to the Southern Cross, and each of these stars represent a different trait; Justice; Conquest; Betrayal.

I believe that I am the last of the Stars, in my blood lies Nanto, and therein this day I shall call myself the Jin-sei. The Benevolent star, to live my life in devotion to Benevolance until the day I die and my star falls from the sky.

The Tale of Coming

2009-04-14T01:23:00.000-07:00

I noticed alot of my friends have been using Blogspot. I originally made this account about two years ago and haven't touched it since. But more so being the point, I have lived this life for 21 years now, and it seems now things are becoming clear and I have a better understanding of what this world really could be, or mayhaps I have no clue and I am underestimating the way of the world.

My Life has been quite confusing for such a long time.
I thought I knew everything.
But when I look back towards my youth.
I was a very troubled young man.
I think all the things that have happened to me in the past,
Have put a little coal in what was once possibly
One of the most loving hearts I could have known

First and foremost I would like to start this blog with a brief biography.
My name is Devin Patrick Lawlor.
In the Philippines I am called Pangkae
I was born September 30,1987 in the distance Island of Luzon
My parents are my father Andrew David Lawlor.
My bane and scar of my life is my mother Elly May Fernado

I lived only a brief time in Manila, I was preceded by my older brother
David Thomas Lawlor.
Whom I called "Bong: his Tagalog nick name
But mostly I called him "Kuya" in those days
Which is a way of showing respect to your older brother.

Three Years Into my life my father got stationed in
Misawa Japan.
I remember Misawa more then I remember Manila.
The trees in our neighborhood had fallen due to some
natural phenomenon type shit or something.
And all the kids on base would play on this giant
Japanese trees that lay broken upon American Soil.
It was during this time my father and my mother gave birth to
my youngest brother.
Daniel Lawlor
sorry Daniel i cannot seem to remember your middle name lol.
His nickname from my mother was "Dan Man."

A few years later I would say around the age of six of seven my father
got stationed on a submarine in the pacific ocean,
We got shipped to Honolulu.
And it was in this place known as paradise
my world fell apart
but the beauty of the land kept my heart so warm
in those days
I did not even notice.

It was in these days I learned of the Love of my Father
and the abandonment of my mother.
For as soon as we got to Honolulu problems started to arise.
My mother was not a loyal woman.
She was a troubled woman.
A pure Native to the island of Luzon.
The American life tempted her.
And it was here i believe she lost most of her heart
because she succumbed to the desires
to those who have never seen a land
of opportunity.

My mother was up until this point in my life
Had also been a violent woman.
she was a loving mother, but I believe the nature of a Filipino person
is a more primitive and violent nature.
Though I hold no actions of violence against my mother
It was her way of growing.

My mother cheated on my father, with my brothers as witness
and one day left us alone.
My father was overseas when this happened and the Neighbor
and a good friend of my father who I can only remember at this times first name
was John. He had a Filipino wife named Marybell and two sons
my first friends.
John John and Brian.

It was here i learned of the importance of friendship.
My brothers and the boys would go off for hours into the forest behind base.
Catching Iguanas and killing wasps nests with sticks.
I fondest memory of these days were the hikes we would take up
Mount Diamond head
Lēʻahi as said by the natives of Hawaii.

It was in these days i believe into my first year of grade school
My father meet a native of the island named.
Karen Nishimora.
And my father loved her.
Karen was from a different family and only of the age of 21 at this point.
And though Karen treated us harsher then my mother.
She made me tough.
And i would like to thank her one day
for sticking with us for as long as she did
because if must have been rough coming into the life of a man with three kids.
I just wish she could have made my father happy.
Because my father has a heart bigger then any man in the world.

But that's beside the point of this biography.
Karen and my father wedded i would think into my third grade and i finished elementary school in Hawaii.

It was at this point where near my dads age of retirement
I moved to Omaha Nebraska.
Wherein I am today.

And I grow tired of this.
Not a lot has happened besides Karen's eventual
departure from my fathers life.

Well alot of shit happens but.
Thats for another blog